Lazy Girl in Action Again – i.e. Posting Again!

I have been a bad blogger – a real bad one. I wanted this to be a journal where all our struggles to parenthood will be recorded but I am being so bad at updating.

Let’s go back to my 12 week ultrasound day. The worst thing about having u/s at random clinics is that we have to explain each time to the technician why we are doing it and that he also needs to give us details on how things are working inside my Ute.

For our 12 week u/s we went to a clinic near our house and there the technician was a young lady in her mid twenties. She wasn’t quite getting our dilemma. We told her about the previous miscarriages but she kept on asking, ‘I don’t understand what’s wrong? Why are you scared about this pregnancy?’ I said, ‘look I hope there’s nothing wrong and you just need to find out that everything’s okay’. Then she said why wouldn’t things be ok (I really think she never saw a not okay baby in anybody’s Ute).

I decided not to talk any more until she starts the u/s. But she kept on and on pressing the wand on my abdomen without saying a word. As I could not see the screen properly so I had to ask her, ‘Is it moving?’

She almost fell down from her chair and looked to me in disbelief, ‘Now why wouldn’t the baby move?’

I wish I was so naive like her! But I was happy so I just smiled. The baby measured 12w2d and heartbeat was 159 bpm on Friday, July 18. Phew and Thank you dear God!

Ultrasound Update

I had my ultrasound and my baby is fine (Thanks to God – I have become very devoted to God these days!).

The baby looks more human now and s/he waved at us few times during the u/s.

I wanted to write more about the u/s but I have just thrown up my lunch minutes ago so I guess I will take some rest now and give details in my next post.

May be I am Lethergic But I am also very Positive!

My younger sister came to visit me a few of days ago. She is a second year university student and stayed overnight with us during the weekend. She was very surprised to see me on the bed the whole time. I sent CJ to other room and so that sis can share the bed with me and since I lie down on the bed and watch TV so she was doing the same with me.

CJ asked her next day, I know your sis is pregnant but what’s with you? It seems like you are also taking bed rest!

Then she explained that if you stay on the bed or don’t get exercise for a while you become lethargic and gradually lose interest in any kind of physical activities. As if I am like a monster giving her lethargic vibes! But I know I have become very lazy. I do feel very sick but at the same time I think may be I could do a little better if I wanted to.

I am dreading the next ultrasound that I am going to take on Saturday. I should be passed 12 weeks by then. I just simply can’t stop thinking about my last m/s. last November I started spotting on a Thursday around 12 weeks, and on Friday morning the u/s showed that the fetus stopped growing weeks ago. I did not feel a thing earlier (no spotting no cramping) so I was not prepared at all.     

Dr. TAK did not ask me for any u/s before I see him on Sunday but I need to do it for my own peace of mind. I am scared but staying positive. It’s a good thing that so far I am having positive feelings about this pregnancy. So dear baby, please stay strong and healthy in there, I am sorry if my ute is causing any discomfort to you but please be strong enough to ignore it. Mommy and Papa are waiting to give you all the love in the world.

More Updates!

So I am still alive. For the last few weeks I was basically on the bed doing everything there (activities include only the following: having breakfasts, lunch, dinners, reading books and watching TV). I only got up to PP (pee and poop) and to take very brief showers.

I was so tried that I did not even feel like going to the terrace which is next to my room. I did not go to my office for straight 7 working days (with the weekends total 11 days) and really did not care about finding out whether I still had my job or not!

But when I came back to work I was thrilled to find out not only that I had my job but also the pile of work that I have abandoned weeks ago was still there…I was hoping someone else would do them for me but I guess it’s a cruel world!

It’s a shame that I could not come to blogsphere during a long time. Actually the constant puking did not leave me with any energy to do anything. I have a lot of catching up to do and from now on I wish to be regular.

Something really wonderful happened at my work on Monday. We have a consultant working with us regarding the process development of our department. Her name is Randi and she is from Norway.

I had a meeting with Randi on Sunday which I was not able to attend. So on Monday I went to reschedule that meeting. While I was coming back from her room suddenly she asked, ‘Do you have children?’

‘No.’

‘Is one coming?’

I haven’t told anyone at work except my supervisor and his boss but it’s not that I am denying it – it’s just that I am waiting for people to ask me, I don’t want to say it like – “oh there’s news – I am pregnant!”

I answered to Randi that ‘yes you are right.’

She is around 60 years of age and has grand children so I think she just guessed. Then she asked me a lot of questions and after I told her about the last miscarriage she said, ‘I think you should be on leave for at least 4 weeks from now.’

I said my doctor did not tell me anything about taking rest. She gave me a ‘what-do-the-doctors-of-this country-know’ look and said she will check with her doctor in Norway but she is sure that I should be taking a lot of rest now and must not be at work – work is very stressful! (I know I know – Lots of flowers and sandal wood powder on Randi’s face!)

Then she asked me to talk to my supervisor immediately about the leave and I just loved the part ‘if he says anything like there’s problem ask him to talk to me.’  

I did talk to my supervisor and there was no problem – since around this time of the year we really don’t have too heavy work load. But I asked for 2 weeks leave because hopefully in two weeks I will be passed 12 weeks and that was around the time when I found out about our last loss.

So for the next two weeks I hope to stay on bed as much as possible and enjoy my life watching movies and reading books and of course catching up with many blogs.