I am Alive……………..

My Little Hero

My Little Hero

I look back and it’s hard to believe once there was a time – I didn’t take a single breath without thinking about having a baby, there was not a single day I didn’t wake up without worrying about my life and how would I survive it if I never have a baby. I held a pillow close to my chest and wondered how it would feel to hold my baby like this. I looked at a pair of little socks and kept on thinking about the little legs that could fill it.

I can never thank God enough for what he has given me. I feel complete – my body feels relaxed – it has done its job (well you are not done yet – you need to do this one more time!)

I am finally coming out of my shell – started enjoying life, socializing and getting things organized. We are planning a very short time out in India end of this month. Its been a long time I didn’t go out of the city.

Cutest Baby

Cutest Baby

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I can’t believe but finally I have made it!!!

Our little baby boy was born on January 19, 2009 at 8:52 pm. His weight was 8 lb 9oz at birth. Although he was brought into the world through an elective c-section on the 39w1d but I don’t regret my decision at all (especially when I look at the size of his head)!

When I went to my doctor the day before he told me that I could actually get admitted the next day and have the c-section, since he thinks waiting beyond 40 weeks is not a good idea for me. We immediately knew that we did not even want to wait until the 40th week. We both were so scared of something going wrong since I could feel less and less movements of the baby and was quite tensed about it.

When we discussed with our parents they were not very happy with our decision but they understood our fear. In my next post I will write about my experience of the c-section. But its time for the picture of our little ‘dude’!

14 hours after birth

14 hours after birth

daddy made some spikes

Spiky BabyLots of hormonal things going on I guess – I feel like crying a lot and actually cried few times over not being able to properly breastfeed the baby.

Breast feeding is not as easy as it looks on TV – I am producing milk and the baby is able to suckle but the total harmonization is still pretty difficult for me.

Things are no more night and day basis – it’s more like two hour/three hour on and off shift within 24 hours.

Custom here is when a baby is born people will come to visit you and see the baby – can you imagine holding a new born with a stitch on your abdomen along with the catheter attached to your lady part (not to forget the bleeding) you have to greet people and say cheese when they take pictures. By people I mean from your neighbor to a colleague with who you hardly talk. It is also very normal in our country that the girl will stay with her parents after the baby is born for few weeks. So now that I am with my parents, they have to make arrangements for 20 peoples dinner every night. I am waiting for all these excitements to be over soon so that I can have some quality time with our little ‘dude’.